Every now and then I have wondered, has everything gone as I had planned, or has everything gone the way it had to go. I simply never get an answer. Just because I do not have an answer. Whatever I have planned for my career, for my living standards, for my education and for myself, those events and things have gone the way they should have. I have deviated very less in this regard. However, BHEL was a big surprise jump in my career, from IT to core operations marketing :).
But when it comes to life, it is a bigger surprise. Once I had thought that I would perhaps never get a soulmate. As and when I came across people, I was left out with huge differences in attitude. Slowly and gradually I started becoming averse to even trying to find a soulmate. In management terms we call it the "spiral & denial death trap". If someone goes into the "Ho Jaayega" mode he is more likely to fail. I went into that same death trap and left myself to fate. Somehow, fate had something in store for me. It had the biggest surprises of all. It would change my way of looking at things and conversely looking at myself being with people.
I found someone, from whose eyes I couldn't take my eyes off. It was not just beauty that bedazzled me, it was something more than that. It was her ability to actually let me be what I am. It was her ability to actually boss around on me, but, still giving me enough freedom to breathe my part of life. It was her ability to give me myself and make me realize that I was needed for once. That was enough as it catapulted me towards her.
I am a maverick who does things out of the box. But I keep things simple even though I might make them look terribly complex. One has to work with me to understand and live with me to figure out, how I keep these pieces of jigsaw puzzle together. One has to engage herself with me to understand the pieces I am made of. And also most importantly one has to make me assured that I am needed and she has to be open about her love for me.
This was done so stupendously by a girl, which I think has changed and evolved my way of thinking. Earlier I used to think that she is so similar to me. To be truthful, she is similar to me in instances of generic thinking about how to live and how to let live. But there are some starkling differences which make us even more unique as a couple. I end up messing things, and she has the ability to put things back into context. When I am lazy, she springs into action, and when she is lazy I lend her the shoulder to rest. This way at least I am useful once :). I think in too many directions and she has the ability to think in one and one only. This helps me back into track. I plan too much and she deters in planning, at least both ways we have a plan and at the same time we do not have a plan. So the confusion ends up on we laughing on each other. I love to blow things out of proportions and she loves to keep it simple. This enables both of us to learn from each other. I love playing with kids and she loves me doing that. This was something I could see when I was there with her at her home. I love to love her and she loves being loved. She hates that she loves me, but she loves me and I love that she does that :D. Our food habits are totally different, they are worlds' apart :).
There are so many things that make us similar and so many things that makes us different. It is going to be interesting with her as we will be having an adventure of exploring ourselves everyday and still won't be running out of ideas. It is important to keep that spark alive in ourselves as a couple, and perhaps we will find that too. I want to learn everything about her, and still I should be left to learn more. That way I will have more to explore and she will have more to enable me do that. I love that I love her.
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